Saturday, June 9, 2007

Karthik, Sriram and Murali

I met him first, when I was in UKG. I didn’t like him at all. He used to drool. Euck.

I met him again, when I was in Class IV. I didn’t like him at all. He used to untie my shoe-laces. Gah.

I met him again, when I was in Class IX, I didn’t like him at all. He had a funny laugh and was most shifty eyed. Grrr.

I met him again in college during an inter-college festival. He was trying orrey the hard. I was rather put off.

Then again I met him at work last week. I have not found a reason to hate him. Yet.

Some names are never meant to be disliked and some always. During my years of schooling, tuitions and assorted classes, I have met at least 20 Karthiks, 16 Srirams, 14 Muralis.

They have all been very annoying. Without exception.

Over years, to minimize my effort, I decided that anybody who is named any of that must be disliked. Why waste time giving people a chance right?

S, the astute mathematician that she is, tells me, I have eliminated 70% of the single Tamizh Boys population in the process. I am not sure how to explain this to S, but all selection is normally based on elimination and not a preference. Mathematics assumes a certain amount of parity to begin with, which is not how it is.

And besides, irrational dislike for people is a good thing. It is better than, what I heard from the family grapevine just now. Amma and Maami are discussing about the attempts of one of the girls in the neighborhood - A akka to get married (what else).

Seems that A akka who is a rather nice sort usually, has turned down a boy recently. Her rationale was that, the boy’s house had no furniture and too many ugly plastic flowers. She thinks that it suggests that the boy’s family is not very progressive enough.

Amma is of course thankful that A Akka was Bharadwaja Gothram and was never in contention, but she is a little worried for T Anna. He is destined to die single, she is convinced.

I just hope we never have to get rid of the immensely ugly plastic beads gopuram (that I had created many years back during a summer vacation) and solar wood malai kotai just to get T Anna married. It is not worth it.

I also take this opportunity to tell amma, at least I don’t have such problems.

Being irrational is way cooler than being a snob.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

akka..unga kaal kunjam kaminaaga!!!

Mathi said...

ROTFL

Toxi said...

Heh, you go girl!

anantha said...

What about Srinivasan? But Karthik, yes, very dime a dozen, wonly. Orey coincidence only, but I had a Ananthakrishnan as a classmate in both the schools I studied in. It feels heartening to know that I am part of a minority when it comes to names.

Why is T Anna being so difficult? You should write about his requirements, and mebbe you will find someone right here who likes all those requirements and would swoon. Worth a try, me thinks..:D

Kadambari said...

What if somebody is a combination of these names?

Anonymous said...

It is 48 degrees in Amritsar today. But after reading an earlier post of yours, I don't think that I should complain about the weather.

Asal Tamil Penn said...

@Kadambari: We will discuss this when I am back on Monday. May be, we can kill him.

M S Karthik said...

My name is Muralidharan Sriraman Karthikeyan and my friends call me Musk for short. I am deeply appalled at your blanket, pillow-cover and curtain judgement of muralis, karthiks and srirams. For one, I know several non-drooling karthiks, unshifting eyed muralis and celibate philosopher srirams. And in fact, none of them even posses shoelaces as a word in their vocabulary

I also wear biodegradeable plastic beads and cover my house with plastic flowers and even have a plastic poonal. I am environmentally conscious and will not hurt plants unnecesarily.

Anonymous said...

All named after important gods though.

Anonymous said...

Kill them only. Great service to mankind it shall be.

Kirubafan said...

What about Kiruba? Good name eh?

Vendakkai said...

This fellow is also a Sriram:

And he should be killed. Can we meet and discuss this?

Thanks.

Sriram said...

but all selection is normally based on elimination and not a preference. Mathematics assumes a certain amount of parity to begin with, which is not how it is.

I thought you said you were weak in Maths..

Eightytwo said...

"Being irrational is way cooler than being a snob"
But if you look at snobs closely, it is their irrationality that make them snobs. Then again, that's just a part of what makes a snob, well, a snob.

Anonymous said...

Sriram,

She loves mathematicians.

Like that.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous,

She loves a mathematician.

Like that.

Anonymous said...

Mathematician? Now, that can only mean ONE person!

Asal Tamil Penn said...

Aiyyo, can someone please help me understand this better.

Anonymous said...

I think everyone is alluding to a certain idiot mathematician who badly needs to get laid.
But you, by accounts until now, should be able to do better.

Asal Tamil Penn said...

Idiot Mathematician? How can one use those two words together?

Anonymous said...

You are so naïve.
Idiot + Mathematician in the Blogosphere is a real thing.

Karthik Sriram said...

OMG! My name means danger I guess!

Anonymous said...

Seems like your eliminated 70% are behind you with guns... I'll tell you what... get a front page, where they need to enter their name, and if they don't fit the criteria, redirect them to the front page of google.com ;-)